Erku — Inbox

[baxiasprice]

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Sexscape Navigator

» Age: 22 » Species: Human Cultivator » A5 Card: Open » Seeking: Allies and those with interesting martial powers to spar with. » Preferences: N/A » Interests: Saber cultivation. Military strategy. » Bio: Sect leader of the Qinghe Nie and one of the primary generals of the Sunshot campaign. Thrust into leadership young, he has had very little life outside of that for the past three years. His seize-the-day approach applies to everything and everyone, particularly when there are mutual sparks. He especially loves to get worked up and worked out.

base code by photosynthesis

NIE MINGJUE

Comments

[unimpeachable]

"A-Yao..." Xichen's eyes close for a moment as he considers what to say. "I hadn't realized it had that much of an effect on you." His thumb rubs over the back of Guangyao's hand as he glances at Mingjue for a moment before looking back down at his food.

"...Maybe some time to adjust to all of this would benefit you? Away from the demands people make on you?" The demands they might make on him.

[taintedpeony]

He gave Mingjue a small rueful smile. "I am just used to fitting into new places quickly. I think that is why." after the kiss he leaned back, to lay against Xichen's shoulder.

He kicked his legs out a little thoughtfully. It has been a lot and he had a feeling it was going to continue to be a lot.

"I think...I think I'll take a month off from the cafe. I have enough credits saved for some basic needs and I can hunt for the rest.

I think I want to just spend a month in a quiet place with the two of you. I don't want to think of anything else. I don't want to think of politics or what is expected of me. Or who I need to be. I just want to figure out who I am. Er-ge, Da-ge. I'm just really tired."

[baxiasprice]

After a thoughtful nod, Mingjue declares, "Then the bed is definitely required. If you're not just going to be staying here, but—" he pauses. Well, it sounded better in his head. "But staying here."

He waves a hand. They know what he means.

"But I." And here he pauses again, but not because he's faltering, but because he's caught once more in a thought. The idea that expectations have simply been done away with is a strange one, and the fact that they were pulled here against their will and have no idea how to get back hits him all anew. "I."

Huh.

"Huh." Huh. "We don't have to think of those things here. Nobody's depending on us but us."

[taintedpeony]

"Get a big one, So you two can sprawl comfortably as well, I plan on using the both of you as mattresses." He smiles at him softly, from his perch on Xichen.

"No. No sect responsibilities, no war. Just us. Who is Nie Mingjue, the man? Not the leader or the hero or even the elder brother? Who is Lan Xichen the man? When he is not the first jade or Zewu-jun.

Who am I? When I'm not Jin Guangyao, Lianfang-zun, When I'm not even Meng Yao.

I don't know.

But I want to find out."

[unimpeachable]

While the talk of the bed has him almost smiling, it's the next part that has him sitting there, gaze focusing back on his meal, starting to eat again because leaving food isn't an acceptable behavior. But the words Jin Guangyao said are still repeating in his head, his grip tightening on the utensils until he has to put them down.

"...I need some air." His voice is quiet, Xichen moving from his chair before he turns toward the door.

"I'll be back."

[baxiasprice]

Mingjue rolls the concept around in his head and doesn't come up with anything as startling or stunning as the first idea that the only people he's responsible for here are the handful he chooses to be. It's a very strange absence of weight that comes with that thought, along with a gnawing sensation that he's missing something.

"I think I know who I am," Mingjue says. "It's what to do about it that I'm worried about."

But Xichen is leaving.

"Oh. Xichen—" He doesn't stop him, doesn't...quite pick up on the fact that it's their topic that pushed him to flee the room. So he looks at A-Yao in askance. "Breakfast over?"

[taintedpeony]

"..." He was sitting up looking worried.

"I think I said the wrong thing.

I am such an idiot sometimes. But I think maybe he needs some space and time to gather himself. This is all a lot for him."

It was a lot for all of them. Later on in the afternoon, he made a note to prepare the week's meals for the UC.

"Are you still hungry? There is still plenty of meat and eggs."

[baxiasprice]

"Don't call yourself an idiot," Mingjue orders him firmly, despite his focus on the door Xichen just exited. "You two did warn me that this place was overwhelming. As long as you don't think we need to go after him, then let him breathe and get his head cleared."

He chews over that as he shifts back to prod at his food. "Yeah. Pass them here." He gestures with a hand to load up his plate once more. Fuel for the kind of physical activity he kept up was all-important. After shoving a bit of egg in his mouth, he then offers, "I feel like a pebble dropped in a pond. You think having to run off or shut down is going to happen a lot?"

[taintedpeony]

"Sorry." he sat up straight on the bed. He moved forward to fill up his plate. He folded his legs together and hummed thoughtfully as he watched Mingjue eat, grabbing at his bowl and filling it up with some of the steamed fish and eating slowly.

"I can imagine. It must be really strange for you. You know him and you know Meng Yao at least, but we are different.

It may. People deal with difficulty differently and being able to open up when you don't know what you are feeling right away can be especially hard.

Back in our world, there was a certain way we had to present, for whatever reason, they vary. However, with sex and physical intimacy involved, there is a sense of emotional vulnerability that comes with it.

Some people use it to not think about everything else going on and just get wrapped in the feeling." Like Jin Guangshan who's whoring got so much worse after Jin Zixuan died. "Some shut down so the actions can be performed, and do what is needed to survive." like his mother who went through so much brutality so that she and her son could live.

"I imagine that this is the first time that Lan Xichen had to think about sex and sexuality as a more real concept than the vague thought of getting married and providing an heir someday. This must have been real and raw for him. As it was for us or at least me, I think.

He gave us his ribbon but there is still a rule against promiscuity in the Lan Doctrine. It'll take time to adjust.

All we can do is be there when he is ready and has figured out how he is feeling. Give each other space but know we can come to the others if we need to."

[baxiasprice]

Hrm. He'll have to watch A-Yao for that kind of self-deprecation coming out again. In the meantime, he does not eat slowly, though he does listen and hum in the right places to make sure that A-Yao knows he's listening.

He's not sure he can relate, but he's listening.

"You're strangers but not," Mingjue agrees eventually. "But even though the span is longer, change always happens at home when you go to war. That's how being away works. Just because I came back to more changes than I expected doesn't mean you are entirely foreign. Just a different person I need to get to know."

He considers.

"And I see what you mean about the sex, but I don't like to miss opportunities. Even if you're both different."

And then he shrugs, because it's really not that complicated.

[taintedpeony]

He chewed thoughtfully. This was bringing up some heavy topics. He breathed slowly before speaking.

“I don’t want to tell Er-ge this...but I died back home. He’s too fragile for it I think as he is now.
I’m only six and thirty. I spent my last life, worrying about what other people say, twisting myself into what they wanted so I missed the opportunity to have what I truly wanted. To even really explore what sex is.” He looked at him seriously.

“I don’t want to miss that again. Even if the two of you are different. You both were the first people to value me. I loved you for it. I loved having sex with you.

Life was short, I’m not wasting it again or making the same stupid mistakes I did in my last one. “

[baxiasprice]

"Yeah, he really did not take my dying well," Mingjue said, contemplating his near-empty bowl. "But since it hasn't happened yet for him, shouldn't be as bad. He's tough. And you're not dead here."

With that verdict, he reaches for one of the last bits of whatever, bound and determined to eat his fill despite the 'dangers' if he's decided to eat at all.

"You'll have your chance to explore sex, at least," Mingjue continues, as serious as he usually is, though he does flick his eyes over to A-Yao to acknowledge the amusement buried in that particular observation. "And whatever else. Make less mistakes."

He sets down his bowl, finally satisfied.

[taintedpeony]

"I know he is." He wonders though. Even the finest jade shatters easily enough. He put his food down and shifted over on the bed so that Nie Mingjue could sit if he wanted to.

He laughed softly.

"I think I've fucked more in the last month than I have done in my entire life. Which honestly wasn't a lot. A-Su and I did before we got married and had a son." He was going to omit some details here. He wasn't ready to open that can of worms with him yet.

"...Due to complications, we didn't after that. I never wanted to go outside our marriage, so I didn't for more than a decade.

And then this.

No wonder I was overwhelmed." He gave a soft laugh.

"Talk about coming off a dry spell.

Da-ge, what are sex things you've always wanted to explore? If the opportunities were presented to you?"

[baxiasprice]

Once Mingjue was done, he settled his bowl on the table, set down his chopsticks, and bailed to the bed so he could sit near A-Yao.

"No wonder," was his wry agreement. He let the rest of it drift off unremarked, however. What did one say to that? About a late wife and child and no sex for a decade? Nothing, apparently, though he did grunt sympathetically.

He kicked his feet out in front of himself and considered the final question, however. "Don't know. Sex in general, of course. With certain people." Another half-smile, just a quirk of the lips. "There's almost too much choice. You're asking for specifics?"

[taintedpeony]

He just settled himself onto Mingjue's lap. Like a cheerful housecat.

"Yes, I was asking for specifics, you ridiculous man.

Do you like giving or receiving? What are you comfortable doing? Do you like being tied up? Do you want to tie others up?

What do you fantasize about when you touch yourself?"

[baxiasprice]

Mingjue was surprised-but-not to suddenly have a lapful of A-Yao, and he rested his hands on him so that—like a housecat indeed—he could stroke his sides idly.

But for all the idle petting, he considered the question seriously enough. "I have only thought about giving, when I think about it at all. Who has time for more than that?" Another few moments of thought, and he offered, "Don't know what I'm comfortable with until I do it. Most things, probably, if I enjoy who I'm doing them with enough. Could be tied up, could tie others up. Might be nice."

He glossed over the "fantasize" question with a, "I'd like someone beg me for it, whatever it is." There was a flick of a smile after that. "Or maybe get us both a little messy, or to have someone's mouth. I know sex can get more complex than that, but." He shrugged, hands wandering A-Yao's sides. "I always start simple."

[taintedpeony]

He made himself rather comfortable, enjoying the feeling of Mingjue's large hands on him. It tickled a little bit but he didn't mind too much. The touch felt really nice.

He hummed thoughtfully as he spoke. "We have all the time now to explore. You can certainly give more if you like. I find that I can give or receive. I was reading it was called a switch because it implies someone switches positions.

I need to trust someone to allow them to take me at least on some level."

Guangyao squirmed a little bit in his hands and laughed. "You say it's simple but all of those things sound really fun. Have you had someone's mouth on you before?"

[baxiasprice]

Mingjue's hum of agreement was short, but thoughtful. He was warm and full and even though their discussions thus far that morning had been serious, he'd been well-exercised the night before and that sense of satisfaction had yet to leave him. With a considering look toward the door Xichen had fled through, he said, "I'd need to trust someone to receive also." He stroked A-Yao's side, amused by the squirming and trying not to let it show on his face. "Strange to think about. Not something I'd been curious about."

Then he snorted lightly. "When would I have had someone's mouth on me? Not before I got here, and you two have been my only real experience."

[taintedpeony]

It has been a strange couple of days. A myriad of emotions but right now he was feeling a bit more stable and in himself than he did before. He leaned back against him, looking up through lashes.

"It is a vulnerable position and I guess I would want a partner I know won't hurt me. It feels good when it's someone you like. Like being stretched and full. And there's a spot inside that makes the stars dance in front of your eyes.

That is surprising. With your shirtless morning workouts, I'm surprised you didn't awaken everyone's sexuality from Qinghe to Yunmeng."

he smiled and paused before speaking up again.

"You certainly awakened mine."

[baxiasprice]

Mingjue was thrown, well and solidly, and for a moment he simply stared at A-Yao in bafflement.

"I did what?"

Because while the information that receiving was uniquely pleasurable was something to consider for later, it also wasn't surprising. Not if so many people did it.

He trained literally every morning without a shirt. Certainly he had realized there were those who liked to visit and watch, he wasn't an idiot, but, "I was busy. I didn't make time for that kind of thing, and it wouldn't have been right otherwise. But surely I didn't—you? Really?"

[taintedpeony]

“‘well you were half, responsible for it. Er-ge was the other half. I remember distinctly thinking that he was the most beautiful man I had ever seen when we were on the run.

But you, sweaty and muscular training with such raw power and grace. A force of nature or a martial god made flesh. I can still remember when it happened. I was seventeen I was about to give you the updates on your morning missives, the light hit you beautifully and your muscles were gleaming with sweat.

All I could think of was how badly I wanted you.

That memory powered many youthful endeavors... I’m sure I wasn’t the only one, there were many who watched you. “ he coughed and blushed prettily.

“‘Of course I know you wouldn’t. I mean you aren’t the type to take advantage of the difference in our positions. But the fantasy was there. I like that we get the opportunity now.

I would love to suck your cock. All you need to do is ask.”

[baxiasprice]

"Ah," was all he could think to say to that. "Huh. Well, fuck. I knew people watched me, but—"

But in the abstract. At least in the 'found him desirable' aspect. He currently had a lapful of someone very much not abstract.

He let out his breath and very firmly tried not to think about he was half-hard hearing A-Yao talking about wanting him back where they came from. He could blame the rice? "I agree with you on Xichen. He is the most beautiful man that either of us will ever have a chance to meet." He utterly failed in not thinking about it or the fact that they in fact did have more than enough time and space for all of the opportunities.

With a huff, he leaned forward to bonk his forehead against the nearest bit of A-Yao and said, "A-Yao—please tell me you don't mean right now?"

[taintedpeony]

"Isn't he just? I hope he feels better soon. I'll go check on him later and you should do the same." He looked over to the door for a moment.

He craned his head up to kiss the part of him that was the closest to him.

"My dear one, that is up to you. If you want me to now I would do so happily, but if you would rather relax after all of this information we can certainly do it later. I want to make certain that you're comfortable in this regard." he touches the ribbon on his wrist.

He was well aware of how deeply and quickly he was falling for the two of them again. Like all those years of buried feelings were wrapping around him and brought to the forefront.

"I belong to the both of you.

And we have time, opportunity, and no worries about what the cultivation world thinks of us.

The thought is freeing."

[baxiasprice]

"Later," he breathed. Because, yes. A-Yao was right about the need to, well, digest. Both information and their breakfast.

Mingjue wasn't so much overwhelmed as he wanted to get out and do something rather than stay inside and indulge all day. He needed to prowl his new territory. He said as much with: "Later. I need to get out. Time and opportunity yes, but I can't just laze around."

But he paused after he said it, gruffly thoughtful, because A-Yao had said something meaningful, something he didn't quite know how to respond to. That A-Yao was his in any capacity was like a flick against a bell in the center of his being and it rang sharp and hot through him. He did the next best thing to words, for him, he reached out to grasp at the ribbon tied around A-Yao's wrist. Then he did his best with, "I'll try to be worthy of both of you."

[taintedpeony]

"I think that may be for the best. Today I was planning on putting together our meals for the week. Or at least begin to make the stock for it. Master Xiao Xingchen brought fresh fish that needs to be salted and dried for later."

Jin Guangyao kept himself busy most days, usually to the point of exhaustion but he liked feeling helpful.

He leaned up to press a soft kiss against his lips. Something about those words warmed him in a way he didn't expect. This beautiful, protective man.

Would it be okay to try and trust him? That it will end better this time?

He hoped so. He closed his eyes and pressed his forehead against the other's

"You already are Nie Mingjue."