A little frisson of warmth and fear zips down Mingjue's spine at Xichen's words. "I—" he opens his mouth to reply in kind, to say 'I love you' in as many words and without hiding behind all of the bullshit that had poured into his life and filled it to the brim.

And he decides before he does that this is too soft and intimate and he feels like he's drowning in it. That's not how he wants this to come out, like some floating, soppy thing when it's something far more fundamental than that.

He shoves himself upright to sit at Xichen's side, tugging on their clasped hands.

"I'll say something now." He says, jaw set and determined. Everything's changed. The reasons he hadn't before no longer apply. "I love you. And as long as I'm here you are going to know that. And maybe I will disappear"—because fuck if he knows how he got there, and he did have a war to get back to—"but until then."

He leans toward Xichen, intent. "So what do you need?" And then, for clarification, adds, "From me?"